Healing Is A Choice by Steve Arterburn is about your responsibility and your part in the healing process. There is so much is wrong with this author and his book that it overshadows any seemingly "good points". And even these "good points" are tainted with false teachings that are not biblically based.
In Chapter 1, Arterburn falsely teaches ""All I need to heal is just God and me" is a lie." Arterburn tells us that we need other people to heal. God won't do it alone. You will have to go to other people for support and help and then God will work through them to heal you. I know this is false because God has helped me forgive people in my life without ever getting an apology and God helped take away my anger towards people many times. I prayed to God and God changed me. I didn't need to vent to humans and go to a counselor. In Chapter 2, Arterburn contradicts Paul when he claims "It is a lie to say "Christians should have joy in all circumstances" (2 Cor 7:-6, 8:2-3). There are some truthful things (nothing you haven't heard before) in this book, but they are mixed among many false claims with no scripture to back it up. So, if you choose to read this book, discern carefully! There is only a little baby and a whole lotta bathwater in this book!
I agree with other reviewers in that I also found the way the author writes about his previous failed marriage is shocking and disturbing. He comes across arrogant and self-righteous. He is all "me" "me" "me" "Sandy's ruining MY life" and "MY career". He never once mentions any warmth or love towards his wife. He never says he will miss her but instead justifies his actions. See below as the author describes his feelings and thoughts after his former wife, Sandy, phones him to tell him she is filing for divorce:
= "Anger, dread, fear and disgust swept through me"
= "I was certain I had written my last book and that everything else I loved doing was over"
= "Not all our marriage was miserable. There were some very good times, great adventures, and a few sweet moments, such as our adoption of Madeline [daughter]. [Notice that Madeline is described only as a "sweet moment" and not a "very good time"]
= "Numerous marriage counselors did little or nothing for us..."
= "I did what I knew to keep the marriage going. I was far from perfect, made many mistakes, BUT [emphasis added] was willing to do anything I could to have a marriage we both could enjoy..."
= "The last marriage counselor had [showed] some hope. [BECAUSE] she thought Sandy had finally made peace with our marriage." [Notice it was Sandy's problem and not Steve Arterburn's?]"
= "I was about to become a divorced writer who wrote about relationships; a divorced radio talk show host whose show dealth with marriage, relationships, [etc]...I was about to become a divorced speaker and preacher who attempted to inspire people... I was about to have a public divorce, and I knew the humiliation and embarrassment would be intense." [Is his own humiliation and career the only thing he cares about? From his own written words, it would seem so.]
= "This book is about so much more than just my divorce. It is about your divorce or your loss or your abuse or your abandonment [Arterburn really means his own "abuse"]. It is about the disgust you [meaning Artherburn] have felt at whatever cruelty has been trust upon you [meaning Arterburn, who is innocent since it was "TRUST" upon him. He is the victim.]. It is about the isolation you have felt from abandonment by people [I suppose Arterburn feels abandoned since Sandy left] who looked nice to the outside world but who were monsters [It seems he is referring to Sandy] to you at home.
Readers might also wish to know that Arterburn admires and believes Word of Faith cult preachers John & Lisa Bevere who claim humans "Are Christ" and have the "exact same unlimited power as God Himself" and we should be able to walk through walls, walk on water, stop natural disasters like hurricanes and tornadoes and pretty much anything else we want to do. We ARE God, according to the Beveres.
I also learned that Arterburn told and wrote about how he got his girlfriend in college pregnant and paid to have her abort the baby. He called himself "an adulterer and murderer" but then sued some Christian guy for telling a business acquaintance this information when the acquaintance asked directly about Arterburn.
Disclaimer: I received this book free of charge from the publisher but I am giving my honest review.